Transcript
at the office.
Sure.
So that ticket he hid there because, you know, who wants to go back to the office for something?
And that was that was that 20 rule.
Nobody else but you guys knows about it.
The break-in was just basically a ruse. so that she could grab that ticket.
I mean her husband's in hell or some shit?
Yeah, yes, it does.
Assuming it's all true, you know. I don't believe the first thing a pretty girl tells me.
You know, she said I'm handsome and I totally believe her.
Yeah.
exactly and then she stops talking in an hour later then i'll then i'll believe her you know
With that being said,
Any moves? What are you guys doing?
guys take the lead. I'm going to finish coffeeing up real quick.
Well, did we get like a mission or anything?
Because the next move, basically, I mean, she's caught, so... You know, you guys can always interrogate her. Go to the council...
We have a couple of interrogation masters, seemingly, as far as just luck. I don't have any skills in the department, so somebody else has got to do this.
No shit. You basically can go
You can go dig information out of her. You guys can go and locate Fugly or the boot. Or also you guys can check the aqueducts.
Worlds are fucking ultimate.
It was probably in the boot.
Fugly is the boots muscle, basically. He's the one buying up and selling. the drugs that you guys found in the goat's ass
The boot is the head honcho of all of that.
the boot after Velvets
Husband, Riggs. Right. After Riggs, the mob boss of all of Turgeth got basically made a deal that he couldn't fucking pony up for. He got sucked back into hell. And so the boot took over. It's kind of like a regime change.
The guy.
And so he's doing it and picking up the pieces of his old boss and finally getting into power.
And so with the reluctant start, so nobody else knew it was coming. He's just trying to wheel and deal the best he can.
Do we know this guy's reputation? You know, like, obviously, he's a crime lord, so he's going to be dangerous, but, like, what's he like? Do we know that at all?
You don't know what he's like. You only know what he is.
Like he hasn't been seen. Ah, give me a... No, it's local.
Yeah, does he show his face?
Oh Handsome. He's a handsome troll. He's about 12 feet tall.
He wears a size...
33 and a size 16. or size 21.
These guys just know he's the boot.
Wheels and deals and drugs came to power. Basically the same things I just told you. Nothing special.
All right.
Should have rolled a gumshoe.
The nose on our gumshoe.
I chose it as my profession and I just have more ranks in it than local. Bill, a gumshoe detective role is almost applicable.
Let me try a Go-Tru rule out then, Rich.
No, I already tossed the local. I just need to remember it next time. It's good.
Still getting settled into my character and what I should do, you know?
At this point, Cherry immediately comes back. He just comes out of the teleporter basically in the back room. He's like, I'm tired. He's like, hey, guys. He's like, I have to start getting these ghosts cleaned up before Council starts asking questions.
I give Jerry five of my remaining 16 gold as a bonus for his good work.
I don't accept tips. He's like, I can't. No, I'm just doing the job. I'm glad you're part of the team. And then as he salutes, you realize he's got a broken finger.
Who broke your finger?
what happens all the time. I'm not basically double joining. He's like, ah, and then he just rips it back.
He's like, probably what you guys call him. He's like, that bitch really roughed me up. She's real strong.
Volto comes out of his office and he goes, guys, the aqueducts. He's like, are you on it? He's like, letting the goals are set deep. Not allowed to do here. You guys are basically, you know, come and go as you please, but I need something. Luckily,
I love when Captain Lieutenant Squats gave me the money. I got to start ordering a whole bunch of people to start fixing up this building. I don't want to be here, but I have to be.
He's like, wipe that smoke off your face, Cherry.
God damn it.
Regulaties go to teleport him, turn him open to chum, I don't give a fuck.
Who hears the... Arguably the best interrogator or interrogators.
Oh, I can talk pretty well.
we need one more for good cop and bad cop or whatever combination of cop you decide to
I happen to have a disguise kit, so...
You can do both.
Actually, now I have a hat of disguise.
This would be really funny. You just keep walking out of the room, come back with a different mustache or something. Swapping in and out.
As you guys are talking, there's just a hole in the floor and Sherry's just like dumping these ghosts down one by one. Good morning.
We're going to solve this goat conundrum one way or the other.
Wait, so you're thinking about going and asking the lady? Is that it?
Are we trying to check it?
I'm hoping somebody else interrogates them. I don't have very good skills in that area.
Like none of them.
Yeah, I'll go and target him. I'll go and target him.
jerry's like okay he's like yeah i'll take a ticket see we have to ask you know we have to go to the proper channels but we can do it and then he grabs your hand who's all going
I can go as moral support
We don't split up the party. We're not rookies.
You understand this?
Because y'all slip up. Wait till you guys start the party.
Half of us go in and check it. The other half go to the demon. We'll meet up in a year.
laughter
Actually, one person go to the demon. I'm going to go on a long series of runs to help go find stonemasons. Good luck, gentlemen.
It's more efficient, isn't it?
Okay, you guys go through it. You know, Terry just takes you one by one. You all hold hands like it's kindergarten and walk through. There's a couple direct places the teleporter can't take you throughout the city.
One of them is the main hub. The other is the church, the council. Specifically, since you guys are using channels, it's basically like holding down a radio receiver. Everybody knows where you're coming from, where that teleporter is.
And not necessarily your business or what you're thinking, but where you came from.
As you guys, you know, teleport into the council meetings, it is still working hours. It's just dusk.
All the counselors are just hard at work, just standing down and just laughing, eating little snacks off their plates. They're The room is very big, very regal, a lot of tile work, painting on the ceilings. In front of you are seven council members.
And one of them stands up and speaks and he goes, inspectors. Welcome. What business do you owe the pleasure? I am the archivist Loren Fenn. I am in charge of records and you came at 1332
Good record keeping.
I do my best. Snide Wilson made a snide comment at me at 1233.
What was a compliment?
And when you say me, did you appropriately annotate who me was referring to?
I have no use for you useless debacles. If you were trying to confuse me, that is better off for Captain Elas, but not me, I just...
Don't want to stop it.
Record what's happening.
If you want me to shout the time or some other loose lips language, I do not have the affiliation for it, nor the muster. What do I owe the pleasure of this visit?
Apparently no one wants to be recorded.
I mean, I'm already recording. I think it's not eight.
A wise choice. I wouldn't say shit neither. I'd just write something down and show them a picture.
Here to see the new captured...
boot villain perhaps she's been a little naughty she's been locked up and sentenced for death For her crimes and her illusions.
Yeah, we've got to do that interrogation right now. Apparently before you murder her.
I wouldn't classify it as murder. She did the deed she wanted to and we are giving her life a swift end.
Trying to get information, dammit. We're going to clean this city up. You're holding us up.
Do you see? I'm holding you up at 13.
I've got a spot. If you must see her go, you are noted. Good luck, inspectors. Then he just gives you a hand wave. And then all of them go back down to writing.
Cherry takes you over to the cages. And you just see a bunch of mean fucking freaks. This is Arkham Asylum in this shit. You guys are passing by the nastiest of the nasties.
Half of them you don't have a dossier on.
You know, because of the fire.
And then... As you guys approach her cage, he perks up and sees Ozone.
This is a wow, oh wow. Oh nice! Hey, that pussycat! And she goes.
It's funny you meet and hear a girl down on her luck.
I'm going to...
She's behind a magical fucking green cage. She's bound with her hands and her legs tied together.
Can I start off with flirting with her just to improve her disposition towards us?
in chains.
Roll Mac.
You Mack well.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
Oh, the pleasures are mine.
What's an inspector bar doing in a place like this? I thought I was out of luck. You know, I'll die tomorrow, so I got nothing left to lose. What can I do you for?
Wait, meta question, was this the wife of Ray Parker?
No.
She was looking for her husband though, right? Or what was she looking for?
Yeah, her husband was the leader. of the gangs that ran targets.
The previous leader.
Amen.
Okay, all right.
She shoots a snot rocket onto the floor. She's like, what's up, baby?
Tell us about what happened to your husband. We want to help your husband. We want to find him too.
Give me
She's like, well, I'd love to help.
And I mean, I can give you my life story. Don't get me wrong.
I don't need your life, sir. I just wanted to understand what happened to your husband.
Basically, he was the best drug smuggler. on this planet he got caught up and he just tried to expand his empire and you know Turns out
He had to kind of deal with the devil and he lost. So, I was supposed to get him back as per protocol. And she shows you her ring. And it's just a giant thorny ring stabbing into her finger.
She's like, it's not my fault. Marriage is a bitch.
What was the deal with the devil? And which devil was it?
Give me knowledge, religion, Ozan.
It was basically some kind of...
low level ponku didn't act for riches because you know everybody's everybody wants to be rich and Briggs is already rich but he just needed help he basically needed more manpower more control
Because the government's already set in its ways, and, you know, if you can summon unlimited beings from the dark, then... You have more manpower to push your narrative, control your wave, and just keep reaching for the skyscrapers. He didn't. He couldn't come with His side of the bargain. So... He was captured. And now I'm just a damsel in distress, locked in, I think about to meet him. Not in my physical form though, as a soul.
What about the boot? Who's the boot?
motherfucker. I was just using him to get what I needed. I just used the boot to basically drug you guys, get you guys stuffed in any sort of compartment as far as I'm concerned. You dummies fell hook, line, and sinker. We almost caught you, almost killed you.
And then after that we use your bodies to track you back to your headquarters. We already kind of knew where it was but we didn't know. I didn't know where the locker was. I was just looking for Ray Parker. Because I knew he hid my golden ticket in his locker.
And what do you do with the golden ticket? The demon ticket? The platinum ticket?
That's a one way ticket.
to
You put your hands on it, speak the magic words, then you go and you meet the devil who captured my husband, Ozu.
What was your plan? Just go say hi?
Paul, I'm winging it, aren't you?
clearly less than you given you're in there and we're out here
launches the door
Emily then shocks her lady like she's like yeah I'm gonna fucking die okay it was my last shot sometimes you do something crazy
Well, maybe you won't have to die. You seem useful, right? You probably know people. You're probably not a big fan of this boot guy. We need to solve the boot situation. Maybe we can find a use for you in this.
He's just another pawn in the same fucking game everybody's running in town. Get everybody drugged up, make a little fucking money, keep running it and running it and running it into the ground. There's no end.
I mean, if we were to take the boot down, what would be the first step, you think?
You know the operations, right?
I mean, you could take the boot down. Yeah, exactly. I know where he is. I mean, he's literally at the docks packing up the shipment right fucking now.
While you guys are sitting here interrogating a poor lady on her deathbed, drugs are being packaged and moved into the city. What was that?
Who's helping him from the council?
Who's helping him from the council?
Give us names, and that will prove that you're useful to us.
Otherwise, I'll mourn your dead sexy body.
far as I know, no one will let councils involved. The council doesn't give a shit about anybody. They just want to keep the status quo.
But
It's coming from the college. And since the council is immediately cutting funding from the college, I can only You can only guess where it comes.
Oh, we're from the college. Please guess.
I'm thinking. You have good students and you have bad students. You have the people who excel in magic and are magically capable. And then you have... your bunkies or your families. People who don't fit in. But they have to stay there throughout the whole semester. Yeah, everyone gets to go to college, but The ones who shine bright are, you know, get the golden stamp and the golden star and they're set on the pedestal. But the other people just get left out in the dust. The people with no homes. People who have no home to go back to. Still have magical power, but it's still being used.
I think
I, you know, I think they're using in those kids. It's dealing. something from them. It's in the dust. It has to be.
There's no drug like this on the planet. That's why everyone's addicted to it.
It's the college's fault.
Do you know who's supplying it? Where is it coming from?
Coming from the college itself.
Oh, I see. Sorry, cooking up my fifth couch.
They have suppliers. We hook them up. We do our deed. We tough man anybody who says nothing.
I wasn't involved with the last inspector's desk, but people who got too close got too close and got killed.
There's good money to be made in this you're saying like how much per week?
It's better, but it's not necessarily per week. I mean, it's the industry.
I mean, you must know the books, right?
I don't know.
Yeah. So how much are we talking about?
We're talking about 75,000 a week.
And it just comes off truck, off boat, wherever we can get it.
All right, let me go...
Chopped and already cut. We shoved you in the goat's ass, you didn't see. You didn't see the process?
No, we were too busy escaping the colon.
Now I'm in the prison. Now I'm in the air.
Let me go consult with my partners here, and I'll be right back.
Hopefully.
She kisses the plastic window.
I leave.
I give her a little wink and I whisper, I'll get you out of there, baby.
These are LipSec Mark.
And then I go off to some corner with my inspector partners here to talk in private and deliberate about our next steps.
I don't know, boys. What do you all think?
I mean, we can,
Okay, yeah. All right.
What do you think, Nunny? What should we do?
Was that... Oh, I was packing the shit, but maybe we should hit him before...
That'll seem kind of a little urgent.
Well, we still didn't, we don't actually know how they're making it. We could theoretically go back into the goat... Into the...
Yeah, the guy was loading the ship it now, so we wanted to hit him. It would have to be now, it seemed like.
Yep, we got the boot.
Yeah.
at least get the shipment part and the selling part. We won't figure out who's making it in the college, but I mean, I'm sure the boot will probably give us some information.
We can figure that out later.
Or we could take over the business and then make a clean 75K a week, which is probably better than what we're getting paid at this shitty job.
I'm lawful. Never. Going to clean up the city.
How dare you?
Oh
So Jake said AFK is like five minutes.
Now I'm here.
Don't make me a liar.
You are a liar.
Alright, so out of game. Do we want to try and wake Pat in game? Do we want to try and go to the college or go find boots at the shipment?
I have dice.
Boots is a much cleaner option. We at least know, like if we go to college, we're just going to be asking around, which I'm sure we could figure that out too.
Might be easier with... Yeah. Might be easier to find...
Uts is following the trail a bit more directly.
I think you're right. And do we want to try and get Pat or do we want to just let him sleep?
College of Turgeth is...
I'm more than sure the College of Target is literally specialized in aberration magic.
So self-protection spells, they are literally the best at it. And every continent has a college.
It's basically Notre Dame.
A lot of good speakers. Yeah, very prestige.
Flammable.
not flammable brick. They're smart.
We don't like this place already.
Yeah, I mean, what is this, Los Angeles? No, it's perfect. And there's institutions that are set in place so they can put out fires. They're mages.
The Druids would help out creating water, but you know. They're a lot harder to come by.
Well, it's probably good we're opting to go after the criminal organization as opposed to the college. We can't burn brick. We can burn most criminals hideouts, though. Upon necessity. Or whim.
Do you think if there's not criminals in the college administration, Richard?
Ha.
I mean, their majors and bases teams coach makes millions of dollars and they don't pay their students for anything. They can't even advertise, you know.
What sports are in this universe?
Well, there's mages and bases, there's dragons and footy. Handball. Ping pong is one of the true sports of normies, you know, quote, unquote. No powers, no nothing. just an airtight shuttlecock and gumption.
Oh, man.
basically anything you can imagine.
I'm throwing points into fucking ping pong.
And no matter what, because that seems to be like as far as a feat of strength. that seems to be like just such a great thing to watch everybody watches it's ping pong is the highest like watched and betted on sport in this universe
All right.
Yeah, because what are you going to do, play chess? Like... You can just do the math.
All right, where do we want to start tracking down boots?
It was a doctor, wasn't it?
Well, onward we can go.
Are we back up to full health? Have we healed whatsoever?
from
Yeah, you guys are. For all intents and purposes, you guys are healed and rested.
All your health points are back at their full. All your spells that you have written down that are in your packets are readjusted and pushed up.
Key points.
because we've only been playing for like two hours at a time. It feels uncooked to have you guys go on a long stretch until we do a long stretch.
I would have to cut it into small chunks and it just, you know, it kind of seems ridiculous to worry about things like resetting spells or HP. Until we get into the nitty gritty.
DLCs.
Then to the fucking docks.
We're going to try to get into shit with that pet though. Like we can investigate, but the action part, one man down in a four person group might be...
Yeah, we'll see. We'll see. We might be able to take depending on the scenario.
That would be
I can't imagine anyone called the boot the pushover.
As you guys leave the council field, Laura writes it down. As you were inspectors, you guys have a wonderful day. I hope everything was...
Yes.
and he slams his book and then throws up his giant red hood.
Both probably.
puts it in his little bag
Is there any of that getting written down?
I think so.
You better...
I'm sure I'll be seeing you soon enough. Hopefully in one of these cells. If you have the time.
Hmm.
just sitting there like in a chair by the teleporter
Knitting it knitting his mama sweater, which he's just the best guy. He's just awesome
If you say so.
Knitters
These are harsh words, Daddy.
Hehehehe.
He's like, awesome. He's like, cool. I hope that didn't take long. He's like, I gotta get back, you know. Where to now, guys?
I'm sorry inspectors. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm just so stressed out. Everything just seems my fault and the building blew up and I teleported to them and people knew who I am and
All right. No. Shit rolls downhill. You get used to it. We would like to go to the docks.
Post haste.
Get some zip on it.
Okay, we can get you pretty close.
Zip-de-zip.
I, yeah, I got a pretty soon. He's like, I'll get you there. Okay, everybody, join hands and do the dance.
All right. Do the dance.
dancing
Okay. You guys go through teleporter, do a little jig. Does anybody do any dance while we're waiting? Does anybody got something for me?
Damn right.
Some sweet-ass breakouts.
100% it's acrobatics. Alizan doesn't have to perform.
I'll trust people can dance.
Okay, he's like, it's the west side of the city. I'm going back now.
Bye, Jerry.
He's like, no, I mean, it's kind of one way. There's no, there's a rotel pouring back. So I'm going to go home. You guys have a good day. I've already clocked in overtime, but you know, it's just a labor love.
He starts walking down the opposite side of the street.
he just starts crocheting he's like I didn't know.
We just keep dancing because fuck yeah.
bunch of houses out. You guys are right next to a warehouse.
Where all the mischiefs and dealings that have been going on. And as DB has basically said. Like this is.
one of three locations that you guys can check out.
that he's been known to frequent the boot anyway
And it's where they sling that Rama on the corner.
Always.
What do you guys do?
Are you guys here? Did the map load?
Oh.
This is black square for me.
Let's see.
Black square.
Maybe the lighting isn't turned on or something?
So let's check it out.
I can see.
What can you see? You better not say a black square.
Just up top.
I see, you know, various tokens.
cobblestone.
Well, shit.
I cannot.
Nor can I.
Uh-uh.
Give me a sec.
I'll turn it off to you guys.
efficient 60 save Maybe I'll just leave. everybody
Nope.
Oh shit, I got it.
They can see you clicking.
the map itself is still just fully black.
Try refreshing your page.
I got something now.
Still nothing.
Okay, scene-ody movement. It's like,
Shit. Here you go, Rich. My bad.
Do it now. Should be fine.
Sweet.
All right. Yeah, we good.
Yeah, go ahead. I have live view of your token. What do you guys want to do? Now at the time.
Um...
How should we go about finding this guy?
Let's see. Well, you said it was this particular warehouse. We could go... We could go hustle people in the corner for info, or we could just start investigating the warehouse itself.
It's nighttime. There's a bunch of drugs around. People just, like, coming in and out of buildings out of you.
Pretty lively. There's a couple breaks, but this is a pretty big city.
I have Pat cast... Mage armor on me before this whole shit pops off, because I presume he's not going to be interactive more than a technically hero capacity if he returns.
Count that. Richard, you are in charge of this token.
So that's not what I said.
Well, that's what I said.
All right, we can – then you want to guys agree to send him back with Jerry?
That's fine with me.
If we die, we just play in Pratt.
He has to walk cherry legs.
That's unfortunately, I guess, the case.
I'll start walking back to HQ.
Either that or you can just post them on the corner. As a, like, lookout.
make some make some money out of them oh yeah
Yeah, look out. Fucking hook out, dude. Let's go.
I mean, they're the best lookouts, are they not?
I mean, come on, dude. We're Team Hancho over here, man. I thought you guys were into making money.
I mean, if you can't prostitute your friend's lifeless body, then who can you trust? You know? Right?
That game is this. I mean, seriously.
Cops.
There's a bunch of structures around you. Wind doors. There's a little light.
The town's kind of having a party. Baseball game just got done. People stand up a little late, but now it's dark by now.
Which one of you has the platinum piece, by the way?
I have it in my... My handy haver sack.
I love it. That's good.
All right. I wanna take a peek inside one of these places.
You can always ask the drunks. They're always trustworthy, truthful-toned people.
Yeah.
back stairwell, you say?
So I like people around us. Are these streets particularly clear?
Yeah, what was the name of the drug again? Like, we could go randomly start asking about it. It might draw attention, but it also might just proc something into happening. Or we could break into this building right over here that we were told.
You guys are looking pretty suspicious.
uh,
What? We just walked five feet?
Yeah, I put on my hand human guys.
A bunch of people just showed, just boom, just teleported out of nowhere. Chair, you're walking back.
By who? Back there by Ozan and Pat, or by us?
Oh, there's only one alley, Mike.
That's where you guys went to.
Drugs called maca.
Deal.
pretty sure, yeah, Maka's in your guys'. handouts in the character page.
Ozone rolled that up in 20, so he knows all about it. So...
Is this like a back alley entrance over by my thimble, or...
Is this just like an area where the lighting broke down?
Right there? No. Actually, let me fix the lighting.
Stay close to me, Nutty. I'm scared.
I'm crying.
What's going on back there with Pat and Ozan? You pipping people out up there?
You're bad lucked off.
Yo.
Oh, shit.
Can we roll the challenge money Pat made us while he was away?
So what's the score, kids?
The door opens and somebody steps outside.
We'll just know immediately.
That could be fast.
He sees ozone creeping up on him right now.
Excuse me, sir.
He's not creepin'.
Have you seen a gypsy woman?
He's rolling up his ear and he's like, excuse me? He is a... He's human. He's got a long big jacket on and a scarf. He's rolling up some shag. He's putting his mouth and he's like a gypsy woman.
Yes, my girlfriend.
He's like, fucking racist, bro. Like a traveling group of people who just come on here, man. They're disenfranchised. That's fucked up to say, dude.
is not racist if it's true.
You sound like
No, he's like, I'm just kidding with you. He's like, you want to smoke?
Any hands just roll up?
voice.
Roll me a Constitution check.
Uh,
Constitution check.
Fortitude? Wait, no, Costos...
I didn't know you liked to get wet.
Yeah, four. Four. Give me a four.
Well, that went a lot better.
He's like, oh, man knows his stuff.
I take out some moonshine and I offer it to him.
Hell yeah, Texas Sim.
Fuck yeah. Have him do a part to check now. See how hard this bitch is.
I have. You're making me roll for it, you take the head shake roll.
Then I take a packet of cocaine,
For all that beautiful vegan footage.
He's like, mmm. He's like, this shit is good. He's like, thanks, man. How's it going? What are you here for?
from back home. Looking for my ugly girlfriend.
He's like, shoot. He's like, I found my ugly girlfriend. She's like, oh.
Lost her in the docks.
Yeah, what's going on in here? I hear a lot of noise.
We're restoring boats, man. We're just cleaning up everything. He's like, it's got to get its fine shine. He's like, oh, man. He's like, but they're about to set sail tomorrow. Big wigs.
Very nice. Where is it going to?
Yeah, and then there's a party. He's like, we're just going to get the catering done.
sense those vibes.
Hatering.
They're going to Rolesk.
We can take what we can. It's a slight night of work, but just pushing that thing until Monday. But they want it done soon, so we're all making good overtime.
Very nice.
Where are you from?
Mr. or Mrs.?
know what you look like. You got some flashy robes on and
know what I looked like.
Hello to address you by
or you call me Mr. Vajidkas. I'm from Kazakhstan.
Mr. Vega guess and he reads out his hand and he's like I'm Dax.
Good name, Dex. Me, I have okay decks. You okay decks.
Take another hit of the same one.
Ha.
Got any more moonshine there, Kevin? That was nice. I'm about to clock out early. We're almost finished here.
I think I might be doing that.
Yeah. Yeah, I give him more Mujan. And I ask him, like, if I'm looking for someone here who I should ask. Who knows everyone around here?
Well I mean, who you looking for?
Someone who can help me find my girlfriend. Someone who knows this area well.
Oh shit, you lost your girl? Oh, that's been crazy.
He's like, well, I don't know. I mean, I wouldn't even know who. We're just about to ready to just pack up here and head out. but i mean you should just call your you know the local garden maybe they can help they're just down the way
At the local guard?
he's like he's like yeah he's like i just spoke out yesterday he's like come on he's like you want to you want to go find her and he starts like he starts like walking in this direction.
He's like, oh, shit, you got a last girl? Yeah, come on, man.
Okay.
So what?
That motherfucker split the party. Sneak up to that fucking door. Bust the fuck in.
Is there a side and or back door to this place? It's hard to tell from side angles.
I didn't catch you. There's a door right here.
Like, is there a door in that alley we were in?
and has a door right here.
Oh, shit.
Sorry, I could have thrown the lines back down. My bad.
No, it's great.
Sleight of hand is kind of mediocre. I'll try, though. I suppose we don't even know if the door's fucking locked.
We just try to open it first, right?
Oh shit, yeah. Look at all those fireballs going off.
You guys start opening the door?
Yes.
Give me.
No, actually, I'll roll it. Actually, I'll roll it. What am I talking about? You guys are just trying to open the door.
Yeah. I just don't know what to... Is that a really...
It is locked, gentlemen.
Should have rolled it.
a lock pick and 18 on that sleight of hand how'd that go
What you're looking, but nothing really hits.
The Dual Rozon went into it, I guess.
Yeah, I guess let's sneak our asses over to the front door.
Fuck, right in the fucking front door.
Motherfucker didn't lock it before his drunk ass wandered off.
As you and the guard are walking down Ozone, he's just like, where did you say you were from, Kidman? Sorry, I didn't get where you were from.
Asasa.
I saw it. He's like, oh man, I've never been.
I hear it's nice. I'm just, you know, I just live in here in the city.
I say, uh-oh.
Wait, what's your name?
decks
Immediately he pulls out of his pocket and quick draws a little...
I get my tech code.
Yeah, and it's like a little Chinese fire trap, and he pulls the bottom of it, and then a green flare pops up into the sky. Roll initiative.
Kick that fucking door open.
Roll initiatives.
Yeah, for asking around for Ditsy.
He pulls it.
A little green flare goes off in the sky. He goes, yeah, well, you caught me. Anything else you want to know? Are we done here?
What? Why are you throwing fireworks up, man?
I got some manacles. We can just lock into the fucking gate.
I just had a feeling that I needed to be picked up and I think my ride's almost here. And then he opens up his shirt and flashes his pistol. That's stuck in his waistband.
Wow, wee, wow. Okay, well, what did you say the guard tower was?
Oh, man, I've said a whole bunch of things, but, you know, like I said, I'm too drunk. So I don't know what the fuck I said. And then he just inhales and the big cherry from his smoke just burns even break. He goes,
You need some more drugs, my friend. You're stressed.
See you around. See you around, man from Kazusam.
Goodbye. Thanks, Harvey.
Motherfucker, just let them know I bust in the door.
Don't let him get away.
Rich, what are you doing right now, bud?
right here at the door, it's in.
I felt
You kicking in the door?
Damn right.
that strength check dude give me some dr what are we doing depletion hardness what's going on Can you bust this door down?
He didn't lock the door, so I'm just going to open it.
That motherfucker didn't lock the door.
Fucking latch technology.
but fine.
Yeah, but the people behind him did.
Fine. I go and...
Unless we want to be presumptuous, unless it's fun being presumptuous.
And going into pummeling, or not pummeling, strike, jabbing style. So plus 1d6.
The first one misses the second one goes right through the door. There's a fist, it's immediately erupting on the other side.
I reach in and unlock it.
Door's unlocked.
Throwing the fuck in.
Not so fast, Hot Chat. What you touch, AC?
It is...
Check your corners, Rich. You got to check your corners.
22.
Your touch.
That is my touch.
16.
No, 22.
22 is your touch? Holy shit.
Dodge bonuses.
Somebody fires a fucking... You hear a gun fucking fire. Bam! And a bullet just shoots out. on the other side of the door.
Pew.
Yeah, I'm going to reach in and unlock that now and go the fuck in. Shift into crane style.
We need to go gather more ammo for Pat. What if the corpses of these people were about to beat the shit out of?
You initiative role there, Rich.
Do I do one too?
Yes, you do.
I was on my head.
You what?
initiative.
Another one.
Lots of explosions happening in the background of the screen.
I'm just smoking a vape.
Immediately three guys come around the corner.
Nettie, your turn.
come around
How'd they get through the locked door?
Some trouble here, sir? You guys came to the wrong house.
regards for a second. Yes, there is some trouble. Somebody I want to talk to.
I'm going to use my wand and use my wand and shield.
And,
bowes.
No, they're all packing guns.
But there's not a thing for guns.
They haven't drawn them yet, but...
get a post.
That is my turn.
How's that? What's up?
Me or bitch?
I thought I had a higher initiative.
I got a 10. He got 15.
Home dude's still there. next year. Hasn't really run off yet. He's about, like I said, a little bit ahead of you.
I look back and I'm like, oh my, what's going on over there?
I think they might be...
Gypsy's
who came and stole my Why?
Not my girlfriend who is a gypsy, for those who are keeping track.
Give me a Roblox.
No wonder your girlfriend Gypsy left you. You're cheating on her.
He's like, hey, I'll see you guys.
He pushes you out of the way. He puts his hand on your chest and he shuns you out of the way. And he starts running up.
behind Rich, right about here.
Can I still take an action?
He walked by you. You can, yeah, you can He kind of broke his face.
Make an action.
I was gonna just clear dust on the three over there.
I mean, there's no one.
Will saves. Do not be blinded.
just the glitter bomb again They all look like a stripper done with the shift.
Got them all. Does it affect...
Does it affect slaves as well? Or is it just enemies?
Well, it would affect him, but you can space it so that it doesn't get him.
The fact who?
Yeah, it affects everyone in a 10-foot radius, but, you know, I... Wait, where?
Keep positioning right to the folks. Got it.
Because it's like a hundred foot buffer, so there's plenty of room to...
All right, cool.
Right, and Light Emulates off their fingers goes and damn near bounces off the small walls and you just see a disco ball just basically show there up and then just explode and everyone's stuck with this just aluminum material that's so reflective.
The guard in front of you turns around and he goes, I fucking knew it.
Heard about you.
Those guys have negative 2 to armor, no dex bonus, and a 50% chance to miss attacks, I think.
What? Jesus.
I mean, they're blind.
Clear.
Yeah, Blonde is such a good spell.
Oh, the glitter dust.
It's so good. It's so good.
Oh, are you invisible? Also, you're caught.
I mean, only for five rounds, but hopefully this doesn't track out.
Five rounds is an eternity.
That's a lot, especially for the front line.
Oh, so the guy in front of you just turns around and just fucking whips out his pistol. Boom! Fires off a brown and misses you and shoots in the wall behind you.
Yeah, because I thought we were friends.
Fuck you, buddy. You landed me.
Not your buddy, guy.
And the guy's still shooting through the door. Bam. He just fucking misses.
Any guy in front of you shoots, misses, make an attack of opportunity.
You go low and just fucking hit him real quick. Boom, right in the gut. Not enough to kill, but enough to fucking wound him. He starts holding his blood in.
The guy in the back fucking Angel Spizzlove shoots you fucking Mrs. Wings by your ear. The other one.
Does the same thing, pulls out his fucking gun and just starts firing. Give me a time of opportunity, Nuddy.
Same thing. Fucking knife him. Again, the back side is running away.
Back to
Motherfucker is blind, so... Does he know where...
Oh, he's blind. Thank you, Richard. Thank you.
It's going to be difficult.
Thank you! Oh my god. Yep. No, dude. Totally. Totally. This better be high.
You run into a wall, you stupid bitch.
Not high enough. He starts running trips and falls and smashes his face into here. He's knockdown prone.
Boom.
Oh shit!
and that's their turn.
Damn, you're a fucking wrecking crew over there. Jesus.
They pretty much did it to themselves.
Yeah, that's fair.
No, they didn't. No, you didn't. You guys are assholes.
You're right. Ozon.
of the lives of people.
through. Blind everyone you can.
Exploding and full of light and glitter and shit. Every time they pull out a gun, they get stabbed and they get it to themselves. That's the guy who gets to the runway. Oh shit!
I haven't even attacked yet.
Jesus.
Glitter dust, you pocket sand motherfucker. Thank goodness.
Jesus Christ.
Yeah, Rich, you're gozy, you're gozy.
Can you guys hear me?
Dan.
Yeah, Richard, it's your go.
I sure can.
All right. Sorry, my Discord crashed on my phone.
Hey, I knocked my mic loose. It's your turn, Captain.
I'm going to pop this fucking door open.
Chunk.
It's a big door, but you're a big boy.
How are you getting this door open?
Didn't I already fucking break off the lock mechanism?
You punch through the door and then you unlocked it while being shot at, mind you. It's kind of really badass.
And I guess just turning the handle and opening it then is an option, right? So I'm just going to go for that whole situation. Just opening it.
Why are doors always such a fucking problem in D&D?
man.
Why couldn't you guys manipulate it? A guard who is outside smoking a cigarette. Who knows?
Because...
I thought we were doing quite well. At least I thought I was doing quite well.
Moonshine with them.
Well, the moment the flare happened, we botched it. We tried. The flare happened, man.
So yeah, I'm going to...
Beat the shit out of this guy in front of me.
Roll it.
Opening the doors in action. I don't know how to get by this.
If I don't move, do I get a single swing?
Actually, the guy is really close to the door.
Make just a... Make just an act on your normal base attack, on your second base attack action, actually. So like negative what, like four?
the door.
Because they're in the same space. They occupy the same space.
I'm confused at what you mean by that.
I don't have a
I mean, like, your hand's already on the door. Duh. Guess what you want to do next? Open the door. And there's a... You open the door, and there's a guy next to you. I mean, you have two hands, so punch him at a negative four.
Can you stop rolling once?
No, I can't. So I have to lower my base damage. They're getting better decks. It's because I will always roll ones on my damage. I have to throw out as many punches as possible. Stack extra damage on them.
You fuck him up.
You get him a knock.
One in the nose just for shooting at me. And I'm fighting defensively in crane style. So I have a bonus to my AC at the moment.
Once the door opens, you hear one of the guards in the back go, Get the shipment out! Fucking inspectors are here!
I can tell by the way they break down fucking doors saying a joke.
Ha
Code Brown.
Well, I guess that's turn unless I can do something else.
It's on you.
All right.
I mean, I guess I'll just keep on... Are you guys all blind, all three of them, or is there anyone not blind?
Thanks to Ozan Nutty. There is nobody not blind in your vicinity.
All right, well, I guess I won't sweat too much.
I was on done blew the coke in their faces dude it is magical
Bitten to find kids here. Just here. Hit this guy right here.
I'll be honest, we really needed Pat for this one. That fucking would have made the difference, being able to make him forget and retry a couple times.
Damn, the forget me stick is real. Alright, now you fucking... He put the scimitar on his back and there's entrails on the floor right now. He drops.
Okay, all right. More guidance keep coming.
Fuck you. We didn't. How dare you.
who
Which one of these guys are hurt? That guy?
Yeah.
That guy's fine. Sky's fine.
Indeed.
And I still have that Spider-Man style like grapple hook glove. So I can just jump in there and start wrecking shit farther in. If you blind shit decks blind decks.
If you can. Well, like...
Blind Dex? I can't really blind Dex without finding a URI.
Oh, you're right.
The math, well, I mean, I could, but it's kind of a waste. I don't know. Dex?
Nah. It'd be a waste. You're right.
Yeah. I mean, I'm sure...
I will,
I'll do something useful.
That being said, Ozan and Nutty, I realize that Nutty, you need to have an extra attack added because your tail has a weapon on it now.
Because of the special item I gave you?
Is that a special item? I thought it was like a quick draw thing.
It's a quick jog. It can be shot, but it should be added also into your base attack. at the negative four
And it's treated as a scimitar.
two up and five in the rules.
did not know that.
And Ozone has a whistle that can fucking knock knockout groups.
I have a whistle?
Did everybody else forget the items?
I think they did, yeah.
It kind of did. Yeah.
I was real quick. Was it 1d6 or 1d4 lightning damage?
1D4.
roll...
Where was, where's the, what was, it kind of sounds familiar, but it wasn't the whimsy one.
Look in your handouts. It should be the whoop.
actually don't have that handout.
I have the drug in...
I'll get it to you after.
I'm talking to Rich, but yeah, you have whoop.
All right, I'm just gonna give,
Oh, John.
Rich here in Pirate Courage.
I still don't see my handout.
Plus two. which should give him plus two on attack and damage
Ho avoi.
Oh, man. Fuck yeah. Those ones don't matter as much anymore.
And that's the turn for me.
Pretty strong on a monk.
Nuts on a monk.
Thank you so much, sir.
Oh shit, that's actually for both of you.
Oh, fuck yeah.
Damn.
you know, my Bardish style is oratory. So I'm just telling you guys a story about that one time, where I got into a fight at the docks. And it's a great story. It really gives you courage.
How you caught that asshole Dex in a lie about his name and boom.
It's a fight at the docks.
Dex just had to say it was a nickname. Dex is on edge. He might be on drugs, honestly.
of all
You can blame it all on them. Mids of Arthodox.
All right, well, everybody's spraying and spraying. Here we go.
Try it.
The Jake Rolo is real nuts.
My touch is 26 right now.
This guy gets up.
two more guards pop out
They're like, load the ship, get the boss out of here, everybody. Just back up, back up.
Hold the line.
Biscuit, pack it up.
Yeah.
turns around and tries to shoot ozone.
Does that motherfucker have point blank shot?
no he doesn't ozon make a attack of opportunity
For an attack of opportunity, can I throw my net on him?
I don't think so. You have to...
That's my weapon.
Your weapon's a net?
Yeah, I'm unconventional.
Motherfucker, dude. Damn right. No shit.
Um...
I'm not very good at it, but it's a...
It's all you're going to do, damn it.
Bringing a net to a gunfighter.
He brought Ned to a goddamn gunfight, and here we go. Roll me. Yeah. Give me that D20. Give me that D20 with your base attack bonus and a CMB.
There you go.
fucking fight.
That's a three to hit. Yeah, no, it's all calculated. It's like proper in my sheet. It's a three to hit.
He says.
Does it hit?
No. No. No. You fluff your net out. You get it ready. The fear in this man's eyes and also the kind of question he's like, what? As you unfurl your net. As you get ready to cast.
Ha.
catch a
This is a dangerous man. He's not even afraid of my guns.
Beware the man with the net.
All right, well, I pulled another net out.
A backup note.
That's the thing about having a net, is you got to have some backups.
As you pull out his net, he clicks down his revolver as the chamber slowly just clicks over and shoots you for one damage. Grazes you in the arm.
He shot me.
He missed, but you know, the bullet got you.
Romy perception.
Shit, I was going to say, how do we go after the boss? He's going to get away. We need to see Boots.
Shit.
Wear the fucking boots.
That might suck.
You tell me everywhere. Every footstep he's taken. I need to know.
Richard, from about here, you see...
It's just a giant green missile object just, boom, shh, can break through the glass. And another green flare just pops up, shh.
And so it's falling down.
panicking
Okay, so where? Sorry, my screen was at the wrong space. Okay.
Okay, I'm wondering if I should go after it.
OK, should we just bum rush?
I could blow right through and get him. But that would leave you guys with this shit ton of people with guns. And I...
We'll be fine. We'll be fine. We'll be fine. Yeah.
I'll fall back to Ozon. Yeah.
I should go to hold him off.
If you guys think you're safe, there's like five dudes in here.
They're fine. They're just, they're little people.
Because, yeah, I'll just, I'll blow right past these fucks. I don't give a shit.
They might chase after you even.
Rich, you turned
They can take all the fucking swings they want. I'm going to bolt all the way to the source of that.
So I guess full run would be...
What's my move speed? Is it 40?
So 160, I'm pretty sure I can make it to wherever that was.
I assume they're gonna take attacks of opportunity as I run through.
26 AC.
30 AC, 26 touch AC.
They all try to trip you and try to grab onto you and you just blow right by them.
This boots.
This motherfucker right here, is this where it was that I... So...
You see an orc with two fucking machetes right next to you.
What do his boots look like?
He's an ugly motherfucker.
Wait a minute. You're not boots.
No, he's fugly.
I guess I'm going to continue running past because I'm not trying to stop at this asshole. He can take a swing too if he wants. I'm getting boots.
Right? Yeah. Oh, is that even a move?
Yeah. Yeah. He double slices twice. Just trying to get you.
Finish your 60
That was a guy you realize who was on the most wanted list.
does, yeah, again, he's going to need to clear, If he's shooting me, if it's just the... or if it's... the melee weapons he needs to clear 30.
He rolled a six, dude. You're fine.
Yeah. Okay. We're good. yeah, I just keep passing through till I get to where fucking what's his name went. Fucking boots. Chasing after boots.
I do some type of role to know if like where he's at. Is there any signs of like recent, like, Doors open like they were bolting out. There's the glass. Where was the glass broken?
Right there. He's the one who shot off the fucking the marker. There's a whole bunch of gunpowder like around you. and you realize he was the one the guy you just passed who made the shot
Everybody's getting fucked up.
And I'll just go back, use the last of my movement to go back up to that asshole, get up in his grill.
boots is going to get away, then at least I can fuck this guy up.
Yay.
Where's the...
Let me make a circle. I need to make a 20 foot radius.
How would I do that? Hand tool? No.
Eclipse.
I would just do the measure and... circle around.
I'm panic circling. I don't know how to get rid of those.
I don't see nothing.
You're okay. I'm panicking. I'm drawing circles. It's a dick. I do a dick. A dick and a baby arm.
And since those guys in front of you are blind, you can step away without triggering an attack of opportunity.
i'm gonna go five and three of this thing repeat
I feel like.
20, 25, 30.
what is this is that like a building or flat
That's a good old-fashioned hatch.
Okay, sweet. So I got like C over it.
Yeah. See over it, walk on it.
I'm going to...
I want to create the web spell right here.
Lerich, did you get him?
I didn't get Boots, I'm on their fucking... Like, I'm on as, like, captain. Or one of his captains. I don't know where Boots is. I can run down the stairs next turn. If there's a map for that, Jake? Is that a thing?
There totally is.
Just making sure I can go down there. So yeah, I can just abandon this guy. Fucking bolt down there. Again, he's not going to fucking get me.
and then you hit the website yeah
Yeah.
All of them are caught.
Maybe a DC 16 to noob through it.
Free flex.
One of them got out.
The two blind guys get minus to their rolls, so depending on the order of them, they would be without their dex.
that little bitch.
Nope, with the negatives, they're fucked. They all got caught. You're right. That shit is just, it's, yeah, that negative fucking negative two, negative three, negative four just fucked them up.
Glitter dust always wins.
Glitter dust, dude.
When can you
Why is it covered in sticky shit now?
Jesus, it's the worst. When people make touchdowns, they need to be thanking Glitter Dust 100%.
Absolutely.
And those who cast it. Thank you, Ozan.
I'd like to thank God. I'd like to thank all the gods for keeping me safe and healing me all in proper time. I'd also like to thank Ozon for casting glitter dust.
I was on you.
Well...
by popular demand.
laughter
out there, all these bitches.
that group
One, two, three, four, five.
get to them.
Sorry.
because they're negative to their will.
Yeah, Jesus.
that or the org looked at you and he just he hits it for 15
Just cut you up. Just a little dervish.
My non-touch AC is 30.
Yeah, because Pat put, or I had Pat put mage armor on me.
Then he misses it completely.
Yeah.
So get back here, get back here little slippery boy. I'm coming for you!
Oh yeah, I got you for three minutes. Yeah. But me young.
Best thing Spider-Man's ever done.
fucking turns man that fight would be endless
my full round attack wouldn't get you. huh.
What's that?
Ozone, we're going to touch JC again.
Oh, 11.
Take any damage.
All these guys right here firing at you through the door.
All the blind guys,
Oh, actually, yeah. Hold on, hold on. Give me a second. Give me a second.
Nope. Take three damage. One of the blind guys turned in and shot the person in front of him.
Guns is just going off. They think Leonard does. It was fucking...
Where's fucking...
That's right there.
Homeboy shoots nutty.
I mean, it's just completely.
more guards coming out the back.
I'll understand if you guys got to run or do you want me to come back and just let boots go?
Whoa, those guys are all webbed. What are you doing? And that guy's dead. Fuck, you can't move to dead, man.
yeah two dead one blind all three of them webbed right
All four of them are webbed, and anyone coming out that second door has to...
Oh, that's right. That's right.
They ran right in the fucking web. Twat waffles.
They have to funnel through this one door, damn it.
Those who were left.
Turn. Rich, it's on you.
I'm rolling down the fucking stairs. This piece of shit can fuck off.
Fucking get that guy.
That's not good.
For you or for me?
for you
Oh, hell no.
That's a crit on me.
All right. Does it confirm it?
Yeah.
All right, what's the damage?
36
36?
Times three.
Is that just one sword?
and he cleared it with, he cleared 30.
Plus 15.
Oh, shit.
Fuck.
You can bait point it, make it reroll it.
Yeah, I think I'm going to do that. That's a good point. Thank you, Nutty. I will use the fate point I have. That sounds like a really good plan.
I say at least one.
This is the one I'm saving. That's a devastating hit.
Also, fuck that guy up, man.
Also,
Time to reverse back. And then he just misses you. But...
That's an attack of opportunity.
down that fucking stairs. I'm going to catch boots, goddammit.
I don't know what you need to do as far as the map situation if there's a place you need to put me.
Give me a little baby and daddy. I see a couple assets right here.
Real talk. Should I just take out this fucking captain instead?
I would love to tell you that, Rich, but I can't.
I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to the other. I'm talking to the team who can weigh in on that.
I could probably take the captain if he joins fights us, so I won't worry about it unless he's on your ass.
I just want to make sure that like, I'm not, I'm not doing something too rash, but just bolting down there and leaving the team when we're already down a man.
I still think it's like the only option we got, catching boots. I'm not too worried about everything back here.
Rich.
Rich, you go down... you go down the stairs and it immediately just goes into another room and there's a door in front of it hey roll me perception
I really apparently am just spotting his fucking tracks left and right.
there's people putting It sounds like people are just shoving things against the door.
force flexing inwards.
for them.
Um,
I'll fucking run and fly and kick that shit if I can.
Give me hi.
Give you what?
Roll high, baby.
Maybe the hardness of
Oh shit, that's not happening.
Damn, hell yeah.
Damn. You kick the door, it doesn't break, but you feel the inertia of barrels and bookcases thrown back as the door flexes back the other way.
You hear somebody go, like they just got crushed.
And I guess that's the turn. And I'll get to work on that next turn, I guess.
Get him, Nutty.
Yeah.
Cut those blind men down.
Could it be?
It has...
It's not the first time you've had to assault a bunch of blind people.
It's not easy shit.
Ha
I don't think it'll be the last.
Stop.
will this be a range of Both these guys are not.
I'm saying, yeah.
I can't like my guy to the left anymore. He's going backwards.
It's all good. Like I said, ruler from the corner of your character. You're within five feet of this motherfucker, you're within five feet of this motherfucker.
I'm gonna just tip this guy. I can't do floral rounds since I just moved.
That's over $8.
Boom. Another knife in the leg. The guy's like, son of a bitch!
How was on you?
10 damage, ozone's plus 2.
That dies. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Keep me honest. Keep me honest. I keep forgetting about that fucking...
I forgot about it too.
Ozon singing the song.
I'm telling a story. I don't sing well.
Helping out his teammates all night long. Right.
you told the story and it was the last song this motherfucker heard.
That's right.
because I am quite useless.
Other than my glitter.
Yeah.
I mean, it's pretty impactful, actually.
That's a fucking drop, dude.
Pick up one of the guns. Just like that did.
I have useless.
You could just start shooting. Like...
Except for my glitter.
You said I can start shooting.
There's a bunch of guns on the ground.
That is such a drop.
That's what Pat was doing. Just pick up a gun. It's hits on touch, I see.
Yep.
Shoot at a minus four for not being proficient, but that's still minus four to get really great. Yeah, it's great.
It's nothing compared to AC. It's nothing. Yeah.
Alright, I grabbed this guy's gun.
Then he hits the guy in the leg and just twists the blade. He immediately falls down and then just croaks. And as his revolver slides towards you immediately pick it up and cock that shit. Cock that hammer.
I thought I was going to shoot me in the back.
a dex-based, right? But I'm not proficient, so minus four.
I didn't.
Right.
And then what's the damage on it?
You look at Nutty and you go, yo mama.
What's the damage on me?
Action, but movie lines have to happen.
One D6 plus your dex.
I got your back, and he just shoots me in the back.
I think that's it. Oh yeah, there we go.
Yep. Mm-hmm, yeah. Six? Six hit this blind guy? Oh, actually eight, because I think my courage applies to myself.
Oh, I didn't mean to roll that.
No, you miss.
DC is low, but it's not six low. Especially with minus four.
That's a damage roll. That wasn't a hit roll, I don't think, was it? Oh, no, it was.
I should have. I should have. No, that was my head is also a low text.
I should have just cracked a joke. That's what I should have done.
She just cracked him, dude.
I don't know. I tried. I throw the revolver away. I got shit advice.
Do what you know best, dude. Just start cracking wise about this motherfucker's mama.
I mean, that was still pretty good. He rolled a five.
Roll higher than a five, you got him.
Right? Literally.
Anyone's messing on a five.
Also, he's blind, so his AC has to be pretty low.
Oh shit. Yeah, did you calculate in that he lost AC and Dex, or minus two to AC, and he's flat-footed, so he loses Dex?
I don't think going outside of this guy is that's a six.
Yeah, I mean, just for future gunshots.
I did. And it's still it's still one higher than that.
Goddamn. So close.
But, you know...
Worth trying.
You guys are taking everything you can. I love you so fucking much.
if you use Thales Revolver?
Excuse me a second. There's a lot of dudes here.
You brought guns up.
this dude immediately moves forward trips and falls This guy moves back and falls, shoots and kills a guy while he's on the ground prone. He's prone.
Glitter, bro. So how are you supposed to do things?
It's fucking six.
I guess the runner hits.
I was going to take five. He just got shot at. Nope. Nutty. Nutty making attack of opportunity.
With my pleasure.
Phew. Nine flash of damage.
You still fuck him up when the shot goes off. Take five O's on.
Holds a pistol. Nutty just guts this motherfucker. Hits him in the ribs. He holds the gun over Nutty's shoulder and fires the shot.
Hold on, duck!
Ha.
I was on Goose! Oh, damn it. I should have said that.
My leg.
Did that asshole follow me down the stairs?
You bet your ass he followed you down the stairs, Richard. You bet your sweet tits. Where the fuck are you going?
laughter
Come get some, bitch. How many more times are you going to land a 30? I'm going to fucking knock your ass out.
He says, I got you for fucking three minutes.
You're going to kill all your friends in the next two.
Plus 15 plus nine.
And do I get an AC bonus from the inspiration?
You're downstairs. I think when it happened, it happened. Right?
geographically, you're still under him.
Roll perception to hear the rock, I guess.
I thought he...
like tagged me with it and it was a thing.
Like how long did I thought it lasts?
I'm pretty sure when Bardic Inspiration calls, he fucking, he strums it. And then it just happens around him as a field.
And A,
Right.
So am I within the 30 foot...
I've never made a BART, so I can't confirm or deny it.
I mean, you are, but you're deep. That's why I said role perception, because if you can hear it, like,
I genuinely don't know.
Just don't roll a one.
I have linear performance, so you have heard me, I think, like, two or three rounds ago, which you were right next to us back then. So... I don't keep playing. I only play once and then there's lingering performance that allows the effects to continue. Because my story, you're still thinking about that really good story I told you about that one time.
story.
It was a really good story.
That being said, it ends after two rounds.
Been two rounds, Jack.
You're right. Either way, what do you roll?
Hit you with the first one, miss you with the second.
he is a basic bitch
Take...
Take 11.
He's like, I got you right where I want you. Nice in the depths, me and you alone.
He's like, don't worry, boys. We got it right where we want them.
You're screaming upstairs. I can't see anything! My eyes! My eyes!
Fucking right.
are fucking awesome, man. I like them. Sweet and chrome. grown cat eye that
It's like magnetized polish.
That sounds awesome.
Yeah, she just hit her nails.
fucking baller.
up back and scratcher.
I give it a bucket scratching.
Neri, on you.
All right.
I guess I'll tap this one in.
kill this guy here.
move over his dead body.
Yeah. Look at you. Oh shit, you're super easy to step over while you're bleeding from the mouth. Yeah. You get that shit checked out. I'm out of here.
No time for you, man.
Ha.
You're a son of a bitch. You see, I got a picture of all the big screen.
Bökehsha, bökehda.
Damn, killed him.
jumping, leaving over somebody and just fucking... Yeah.
Excuse me.
Excuse me. You are my bagel, but I have to just say.
All right, Ozone, it's on you.
I love the idea that Pat's on lookout half a block away, and it's just kind of ignoring this gunfight go-and-so.
No, dude, he's having a breakfast sandwich at the end of the block, dude.
Green flares going off in the sky.
He's like, check that shit out. Son of a bitch.
We need more men over here. Man, this is good bacon.
All right, so this guy, Over here.
I say, The mom was so fat, drew his worship hair on full moons.
DC 17 will negate.
Ha! Oh shit! Your mom's a part of a pagan ritual? Oh shit!
Your mama's so fat she's fest us!
How's he doing? Is he laughing? Does it hit?
That's a minus two.
I mean, dude, your joke's always fucking hit, Daddy.
Yeah, so I was laughing, debilitated.
I'll be here all night.
but that's the end of my turn.
The guy who made you laugh is cracking up so fucking hard. He's like, I
I think you skipped my turn.
I think I did too.
Rich, go twice.
I got to get another run on me. You know, he has the potential to hurt me a lot. So, you know, you put him there for assuming that purpose.
You're a monster.
Rich, you're the one running through a crowd of people punching your way to success. You can't you can't you can't do that.
I know. I know. I know. I'm just giving you a shit.
You can't be like, you're a monster for people doing what they need to do. As you leapfrog your way through a house with everybody shooting guns at you. You're fucking daredevil and they're doing their best. You piece of shit.
That's the monk lifestyle.
Basically a rogue.
Yeah, he left me with like five life or no, two life of like, no, 39. No, don't do that. I can't even get looked wrong after that.
Yeah, also, you're also you're the one who ran ahead of your team. The Iceland itself, you know, box.
And you see
What do your Aryan eyes tell me, Rich?
that I fumbled. So what happens there?
Or, well, I suppose it's a one. But how would you like that to manifest, sir?
Well, he misses the attack of opportunity. Did you try to attack him? Okay, so...
you try to attack him he tried to attack you it failed you guys go blow for blow and you're trying to you're trying to grab his weapons
And who?
Roll me an acrobatic shit.
Yep. Stay on your feet. You're just fine. You're just fine, daddy-o.
All right. And then I guess...
And you try to flurry up blows and going into it and he tries to attack you. You drop to your fucking knee and do like this little backwards swoop and you just pop right back up.
And I'm assuming none of those hit. Does the 20 hit?
None of them hits because you rolled the one on the first one.
Round two.
That looks better across the board.
That looks way better across the board. Holy shit. Holy shit.
I am obviously leading with the stunning blows, but it's just the order that makes me toggle it in. That's the slot I put it in.
Declare it next time. Declare it before you want to go off. I'll let you, but monk rules. Always declare. If you do declare,
Sorry about that. I, yeah.
I apologize. I failed to enunciate.
four stairs rich you Jeez.
You've got to stop rolling once, man.
Oh, there is both... Fuck, I forgot. I need to roll the d4s for the lightning damage.
on each one two three d fours
That'll account for some of my ones.
And I guess stun check. See if he holds up.
This is plus 10.
Damn.
Close.
Worth trying.
you really just start popping him in his ribs he's open chest
Oh, no, now it's rich again. No, and that was your again. Okay, now we're at the top of the queue.
All right, that's great.
No, that was the second term.
Nutty.
Huh. Wait. Why is this guy dead?
I killed this guy and then moved here next to this guy.
One of them got shot by their teammate when he fell over.
That's true.
He was already deleted. I just deleted him.
This guy is okay. This guy is okay.
like i was here i killed this guy and then i moved here last turn
And now you're... Okay, yeah, now you're next to a guy who actually, you know, behest... Everything that's going the fuck on is not blind. So...
Debbie the guy.
charity
That's why he gets the sword.
Six damage.
Oh, wait. And the tail.
Where's my just attack button?
lowest base attack bonus.
Belee minus four.
16 to hit.
That's there.
Sorry, I walked away for a second. That hits.
than one for damage.
Jesus Christ.
Ha.
I'd make up for that Venus tick. That was way better.
After his friend dies, you move up to him. He tries to put his hand on your shoulder. You stab him in the fucking arm. And then your fucking tail comes up and whips him right in the fucking back. And he's like, ah!
I'm still alive! That is what he says, I guess. After that. I'll fucking bite you! Well, Mama's been sick for weeks. I'll live forever, motherfucker. I'll live forever.
I'll live forever.
I was on you.
Crazy. It's like you guys would have been doing so much better if you had four people.
I feel like we're doing pretty well, all things considered.
Yeah, how did that make me look?
To be fair, it doesn't seem like we're catching boots anymore. We might have actually caught boots.
Weak as fuck.
This guy.
Oh, yo, oh, joke.
Negative one, Ozon, give me a fucking... Or negative two, then give me a fucking Yo Mama joke. Whisper.
Oh, yo mama's so slow when she draws her pistols.
There's nothing I like more.
Mama so bad she has more rolls than a bakery.
Yeah, this guy is fucking ridiculous. You guys are fucking crazy.
right switching wraps going back to the picture
Alright. This guy clicks his heels.
Ah... There's the extra tax it's going for.
Not that, not that.
First one misses. Second one hits. Third one misses.
All right.
Plus four. 20...
Three.
I thought he only hit me with one of the scimitars.
Oh, he did.
14th.
He looks at you. He's like, you're looking like fresh meat there, boy. Boss is already gone. It's just you and me now.
Yay!
What a great response, dude. What a great response to somebody who just... Alright!
Yeah.
Okay, now he takes...
That's not good.
A what?
Then you take eight from the guy next to you.
Also make an attack of opportunity.
Oh, yeah.
Motherfucker.
I see what these two fucking clowns are doing.
They just fucking... fire at the walls next to him.
out here laughing his ass off.
Can't even break his own spell.
Rich.
Yeah.
Hold on, hold on.
I yell.
and stuff.
Yeah.
Go ahead, Rich.
right. I yell officer in need of assistance as loud as I can, you know, so that they actually hear. And then, we're going to go for another while leading with the, stunning strike.
It's so crazy.
Missed. I mean,
Yeah, it's the versus AC, and then if you pass the AC, I make the fortitude save, right?
So does the 23 land?
Shit. Yeah, the 23 totally lands.
make him take that fucking stun check
Oh, fun.
then what 12 and then 18 damage. Or 12 and 8.
There's another 20.
Yeah.
How's the guy looking? Let's say I've racked 20, 40...
Seven...
56, if we're counting here. But who's counting? Who's counting?
Fifty-six. Fifty-eight.
58, actually.
And that's gonna have to be turned.
Nadi.
Ask me, this guy's still alive, the one that's gonna live forever?
I want to fucking live forever. You can suck a dick. I can't wait to spend my drug money on whores and go back to my wife and kids in another country. I have plans. I'm making vacation this year. He dies, Nutty. You got him.
Ah, okay, I still have one.
It's one day before retirement.
Alright, are those the stairs Rich went down?
What's up, Nelly?
the stairs, which window?
we make it to rich how many more guys we got they're blind but they're gonna be unblind soon
How many guys do you see?
I think I only see one that you can't see which was like down there
You want to make your way towards the stairs?
This guy is just on the ground laughing, I think. So he's going to be up. But we can go downstairs, you know. I think I heard something.
funnel them there. Yeah, Rich said you need help. Man, the stress. Kill anyone on the way.
And here he was worried about leaving us for our safety.
Right? Rhys just fucking dipped, dude.
Save his ass, I guess.
Yeah.
jokes. I think I still have some glitter.
I might try to get down the stairs but I'll move there.
Alright, there's a door in front of you guys by a red line.
a massive shipping door.
I couldn't make it.
And then the stairs with horrible little tape around it. Like, hey, don't fall, you know.
OSHA regulated tape, as it were.
I support the railing system.
Mm-hmm.
We full move down there, right?
No, I had to kill that guy, so I can only move 30.
I see. Well, I don't have to do that.
So I move down the stairs.
And that's my turn.
Are you downstairs, Ozan? Can you see?
Negative.
Wait, where we're supposed to be able to see?
I'm still in the old room. on the old map.
Yeah, I never moved to the new map, so I had no idea that I was supposed to be seeing something.
Yeah, it's...
I've just been imagined. Old school style.
No, he saw me.
That's the old man.
I haven't worked that out. There's a tab where it's like, hey, the group can see this and you can see this.
Okay, well, then after that, it's their turn.
Come on guys.
It's so incredible. It is just amazing.
funny
Impactful.
Yeah, they're blind. They don't know what the fuck's going on. They're screaming for help upstairs. You just hear a bunch of shouting upstairs. Now you hear a bunch of things sounded like they're being moved. And you hear, do it, do it, lock it up, kick it out, kick it out. And you hear the sound of a sail being flapped.
Well, that's not good.
Yep, they were getting away. Goddamn. Sorry, boys, I failed.
I mean, if he's on a sailboat, then you'd have to fight a whole sailboat of guys.
Is it a flammable sailboat? Can we light it on fire?
I'll be able to web it in place.
Having it.
I don't have any offensive spells. Yeah, you have it all netted. That shit's going nowhere.
Blitter's flammable, right?
One. Oh, OK.
ozon you trot down the stairs one two three it's you ozon one or four five six it's flags
I still can't see the map, by the way.
If you want, you can just move it all down there because I'm going to be running down there anyways.
That's right. He's not done fighting me yet. He said three minutes of play time. It has been like five turns max.
30 seconds is not three minutes. He better not be turning on Ozone.
1510.
Those are some misses, thank God.
it misses just rolling garbage he just starts trying to swing you after being punched like you'll never do it
I can't see anything besides the black square again.
Still blonde.
no worries we'll fix this we fix this so
refresh your page
Can do.
I still have the black square.
I think that I'm now.
Yeah, we good.
that here...
He tries to do another fucking double cut dash with his knives. He misses horribly, Rich. This guy just literally can't get it done. This ugly mug and his teeth like a goat's horn where they're digging back into his fucking temples. So if they just let it grow, he will slowly die. He's going mad. And then you still hear, after your giant kick through the door, people on the other side putting things in front of it.
Goddamn.
I think we're getting through that door. The only way to go up and above and around
We can do that.
I think it might be late with it. By the time we drop this guy.
They already got the sales open. I mean...
He didn't say anchors up. He didn't say anchors up. Anchors up! Shit!
I could literally see what it was after it.
You said sales open. All right.
And yeah, I could in theory go ethereal and just roll up towards where the boat should be and just abscond from this fight.
You hear that, guys? Richard could have done this whole time.
I can handle it from here.
We should have magical powers, you guys.
But, I mean, that boat goes away. I don't have any, like, magical spells to catch up to it.
Yeah.
Can't like teleport once I see it or anything. If that starts sailing away, you're gonna have to jump off or something.
Yeah, fuck that.
Go in there, one man team knock the guy unconscious and jump off of his body.
Hope he doesn't drown. We're questioning you if you survive.
maybe seals it. Well, you're supposed to hold them. You jump out with them, hold them.
You're supposed to hold him. Even if he's bleeding through his throat and nose, you have to hold on to the guy.
Shit, I missed that step.
You beat him to death. No, he's alive. I held the guy for questioning. Richard, your turn.
Kihei... And I don't presume the 11 or the 12 hit. So that is just the 14 plus 1d4.
And it did.
takes another couple shots
God damn.
He's a big guy. He's pretty rough.
I'm going to have to give them the full bean. I'll give them the wash-a-kaw.
And he is flanked at this point.
That he is. Oh my god.
that time rule one.
Nadi, could you please describe the Washa Shah? Do you inscribe any kind of magic or like what's going on in the Washa Shah? Shashashaka.
A Walshashah is my first basic attack. So that obviously missed. And then I get a second base attack, and then I... inscribe a spell onto the second base of the attack that also casts a spell when it hits.
Yeah.
also provoked a tackle of opportunity for him.
Thank you for your honesty.
I miss and then the second swing comes in, he gets a tag ball opportunity.
Man.
You're AC, sir.
26th.
Yeah, it's... Follow on. plus four
13.
So each Six, hold on, hold on, hold on.
He's a nutty, he's just fucking... He's grabbed up next to him, stabbed him, he's stabbing back.
24 damage I hit him for.
He dies.
That's the watcher, sir.
actually dies or like unconscious bleeding out.
Nutty killed this motherfucker.
Damn it, we needed to question him. Damn it.
are crying out of the boat still.
What's what spell was on the washer shop?
Magic finger, it was. Was it lightning?
Not what we do alone. What spell did you cast?
change the environment.
touch attack
with their grubs by shoulder. They're fucking training blows like it's a boxing match. They both have each other in their robes. They're just stabbing each other. Dude, one in the end of the shoulder. Nuddy just keeps gutting this motherfucker and hits him with the lightning damage and fries his brain.
You know what? Fine. I take this motherfucker's boots and put them on.
It's good.
I know what that fucking click is. Put these goddamn boots on.
I could just Google about them instead of go through my thing in a bobber.
Richard, roll a D100.
Oh, shocking grasp.
Richard, those boots are boots of haste. Once per week, you can use them.
Yes, sir.
Wait, I thought they were 10 turns a day.
Not in my world, they're not.
No, that role.
If I go to buy Boots of Speed or Boots of Haste, will they be... as you've said it now, or was that just what they were because that's the quality?
Those are his. Those are his, yeah.
Deal.
And they last for how long? You said you could use them once a week.
once a week.
for how many turns.
Give you the hay spell as a six level caster.
or as your character level or a sixth level.
the level it was imbued on them So six.
This is what he had on.
I was hoping to use these to go catch the boat so I put them on so fucking fast is the turns they're still active
The turns are still active. Give me a sec.
Because, yeah.
Naughty.
Who's being naughty?
Because in theory, I'm not taking multiple turns to do this. I'm just fucking getting these motherfucker's shoes right quick and then going out the door.
Roll perception, everybody.
And what is everybody's languages?
Common, undercommon, and tengu.
Common, Elven, Dwarf, Draconic, and Abyssal.
Nice.
I got common and goblin.
American Goblin's a good choice.
Alvin's always a good choice. Zero. Crazy. You hear... And you hear the door flex again, and the door pushes inward. to your guys' vision.
And they're like, and it sounds like it trails off.
Like they're running away.
Up and over.
If you guys run up and over, I can bolt through the walls.
I just hit, so it's two of her turn...
You guys are in your own little free zone right here. There's people still alive, but they're blind upstairs.
So
It's not permanent. It only lasts like five rounds.
So, yeah, as soon as it's possible to...
fucking yeah whose turn is it
It was his. He died.
All right. Fucking worry, y'all think.
Just. We'll run to the boat, see what's up.
Tell me we're getting through that door.
And again, I can genuinely just go ethereal for, I want to say it's 10 turns. and go through objects, I could literally just, if the haste spell is still active, I can probably catch wherever it is, and at the very least cause chaos and point where the team, like where you are or where to go.
Sounds good, but you will probably be by yourself for a bit. I imagine it's going to take us a while to loop around.
I'm going to immediately take a fucking couple potions.
I'm also going to need to do that. The guy hit hard.
Yeah, that guy hit really hard. Thank you for reminding me of the fate point, because he really was going to bring me down from full health to two life with that hit.
I will drop me instantly.
It's like, no. It's all very dangerous.
36, the fuck?
I looked at my health and was like, I don't even have that much health.
I don't know what level he was, but he had a plus 15, so like... He either had like a plus eight on his strength and was just a couple levels above us or maybe plus like really good weapons, but it doesn't seem like he showed a really good weapon. He just had basic bitch scimitars apparently.
Yeah, no, he's probably at least double our level.
Thank you for coming and saving me. I was about to go wrong.
Yeah, every time you hit a monster, you're like, okay, yeah. Let's have them on the ropes now, right?
you cracked a good for twenty or whatever and i was like how is he not dead
I think I may have started a fight I shouldn't have.
I think I'm in a bot fight right now.
Ah, no, some limits, apparently.
I thought like the first hit, I was like, okay, I was just a crit, all right? That's why it's so high.
He's gonna be fine as long as he doesn't get crit. Wrong.
Well, honestly, I'm trying to think, because he would have been... If it was plus four to damage...
would hit.
Yeah, it'd be for strength.
that'll be...
He had a plus 11 to hit or something like that. So, fuck.
Yeah, 18 strength.
We took a level 11 down.
He would have to be below a certain level because he would have three attacks if he was above 10. Might have just been 10.
Oh, that's true, yeah. He was the fighter.
Fuck you guys and your table talk. Fuck you guys. Hey, fuck you guys on that shit. How dare you? How dare you? What are you guys doing here? What are you doing here, dude? There is something, you know, called the mystique and the illusion, you know, right? Like, we're supposed to suspend a leaf here. Come on. What are we doing?
What?
Yeah. How dare you?
laughs
Care both.
What else are we supposed to talk about with that big motherfucker downstairs? He fucked us up.
The boots of haste still work?
Boots of Hay still work.
As in when I put them on right now, they're active or I can click them and turn them on.
Putting on the boots taking him off a body. That's an action jack
You can put them on and click them like Dorothy.
But you can't run.
put them on and quick draw my, one of my potions and, yeah. I'll drink that and go next turn. And that's whoever's up next. I'm going to
What potion? Roll it.
Will do in just a second. Getting back to the keyboard.
All right, so Cure Light Wounds is... 1d8 plus 5, right?
I think so, yeah. Depending on who made it.
Look at them ones go. Ha. It's all my D6s that manifest as 1s, too. Not all my attack rolls, but my D6s.
It also makes me worried that if you haven't, then I've been playing it low the whole time. Then I need to scale the fuck up. Because you've been managing with these ones like a champ.
not necessarily dealing a lot of damage. I'm just... Nuddy has dispersed a lot more damage than I have.
Ozone. Ozone's glitter dust, dude. I mean, I...
I'm also going to drink pot.
So yeah, it's whoever else's turn. Yeah.
Nice.
Peace.
Yeah, a moderate healing potion is 3d8 plus 10.
should have sprung for the moderate.
uh,
Yeah, I'm looking. I'm going to Archive's net this. So then Alessar is 2d8 plus 5.
1d8
All right, group turn. Go ahead. What do you guys do?
Right upstairs, chase after that boat. Want to be a part of that boat life, baby?
Like my motherfucking heels and use two key points to become...
Ethereal.
Okay.
I believe that counts as a move action, so I just have to wait for... rest of the turn to fly through the door and all that.
You get on potions and whatnot?
Yeah, I'm not that banged up.
Banged up?
29 HP still.
Like the one time I actually bought health potions.
I have pure light wounds as a spell.
Son of a bitch, Ozon.
Tommy, I just drank 50 gold.
50 gold
50 gold? That's what mine fucking costs, and I got a D8 out of it. God damn it.
You went, you went in, you guys went into a fucking warehouse, guns loaded with people firing at you, and you're complaining about gold as you're chugging potions.
Jake, what I do is I go find the infirmary or wherever the fuck they keep the potions and I take their health potions.
50 gold is for a moderate.
shit I think I need to re-roll that then
They probably have a band-aid station around here, right? Can I search for one?
Yep. Give me a perception. Give me a plus like three on it after your roll. Just double check. See if you can see something.
Yeah, all right. Plus three would be 25.
Totally. There's one right off to your left. It's worker safety.
Is it five grader?
Yeah. What? No, I said five lesser.
Oh, you said yeah.
Vib... Lesser?
Uh-huh. And bandages and tourniquets.
Also the manual telling you how to use these.
Wait, no, I definitely read the wrong thing.
Iron Eddie, you can have the five lesser healing potions.
I'm about to use magic on myself. Oh, 11. Maybe I heal up.
Channel Positive Energy. Let's go.
Unless none of you guys are vampires, right? Did you guys get bit?
Ozone, Wynn got some health packs. Next.
you wrote them down, right?
In front of the thimble, there is a door. But other than that, there's a whole cacophony of other things in this warehouse.
look for clues.
Do we know if a boat left yet or not?
fucking catch up to the boat.
You guys heard the sales two turns ago.
Where I was headed.
I mean, you heard sales. You guys don't know if, you know, you're at the harbor.
There's a door right here.
door down here.
You guys went down serves.
and then back upstairs
I am still downstairs and I'm just going to fly through that door on my next turn.
Your turn, Rich.
With my speed doubled, I have 80, and I'm going to do a full fly and go through the door kind of near ceiling level so I can pop my head through the floor and see the layout as it changes. I'm just trying to see where... the boat is or the way to get to it.
All right, well, you're on full run. And there's a door in front of you basically right when you get out of those stairs.
I'm in the ethereal plane right now, so I'm just...
If you want to
You are in the ethereal plane. Jesus Christ. Okay. Yep. Yep.
I am flying through, bobbing through walls and floors looking...
80 feet. What's your run?
80 feet, my run would, I guess, be 360, right?
Shit.
Wait, no, 320. Sorry. Bad mathing.
Doesn't matter you turn it through you go into the fucking Sonic realm You immediately just start blowing going upstairs and going through doors Right when you go through the first one you see a whole bunch of carriages and a whole bunch of barrels and then in the and then once you pass that room you see another room with a giant crane Let's see, where are you at the temple?
I am indeed the symbol.
And don't worry about swapping the map around unless you think it's particularly pertinent, because, yeah, I'm trying to bob in between the first and second level.
And then once you reach the fillable, like at the back corner, all you see is just a giant river about just leagues across. And then about another like 200 feet in front of you just see a giant troll on a ship already leaving. Looking back...
Oh, I'm lighting up.
At his own base.
I am lighting that boat on fire.
And he's just staring at it.
Can he see me in the ethereal room?
Of course he can't. He cannot. He has no idea. He's literally looking at his exit hole. When he made it back. And then as you look at him, you look at him and he looks at you. He can't see you. But you guys basically lock eyes and then he starts... pumping his fist And then he turns his back as the ship leaves out of the harbor.
Oh, I'm flying. His ship's not leaving the harbor. I hope he's a good swimmer.
This isn't over yet.
Well, it's other people's turns now, I assume.
Snuddy's turn. Snuddy, you up.
Depends on if they can fly. Can we all fly?
Hat has a wand of fly.
Let me check. Let me check. Yeah, I'm going to remeasure it. Nah.
We're checking out.
Pat does have a wonderful eye.
Actually, no.
And he is standing out front guard. You could go snag him like an enchantment.
I full run upstairs. try and get visual on the boat. Do I have... Visual on the boat.
Once you go up the stairs, you are still inside of the warehouse.
from your from your optics there is a door here
in everything you see.
I can go 90 feet from downstairs.
I want to run 90 feet towards the boat.
Well then you,
hit a door right here
Yeah, Rich and I go out that door?
Rich went intangible and started running and he started running through shit.
Oh, that's right. He went through the door downstairs.
He literally ghosted.
Unlock that door.
I unlocked that door.
I know you were shaming me for it, but I saved it for this exact kind of purpose because that thing's expensive. It's actually three, so I have one key point left.
Nettie, roll me a disabled device check.
Who locked the door from the inside?
People who want to lock you out.
like a lock on the inside of the door or on the outside of the door
Just go the long way.
Out and around. Go to get fly across from Pat.
I'm just going to run the way I know the door is open.
I can't full run and try to table device check.
I took a hit from my cigarette.
Dude, puff it up, Chief Captain. You were still holding the cigarette that motherfucker gave you before you just smoked his whole fucking time. You still got that cigarillo. While you were blasting jams and blasting beats, making everybody fucking laugh, you still have that fucking cigarillo.
Oh, yeah, there we go. Chief in.
Ha!
It's only been about like a minute, right?
Is there like a flammable section, like gunpowder or gasoline or anything on here that...
It's all wood, man.
Well, then I toss the cigarette into like a pile of papers or something and I walk out.
Following Nutty.
there somewhere feels good
That was great.
casual, you know?
Maybe whistling.
The building starts catching on fire.
spell where I can read to.
I can cancel my website, alright?
Your spell, yeah, your spell should be gone. It's been a minute.
and these usually up like five minutes.
These blind motherfuckers went home.
Rich, your turn.
All right, I'm going to full fly to get to the boat.
You're still ethereal?
Damn right. Last 10 turns.
Do you see when... when the big boss troll looked at you and didn't see anything, and the noise finally died down. And he looked at you and you weren't even fucking there. And you looked at him. He turned his back. And he goes, and the whole fucking ship crew goes, And then he starts walking back down to the ship's main level. And that's where we're going to end it, right there. With Rich flying towards the ship.
Oh, man, I was just going to light the boat on fire and be done with it, but you're going to make us – just keep that in mind. That's my plan. So –
Then again, I may reassess that if I'm not actually having to do this with half health and burned out everything and missing party.
Yeah, Rich. Do it without the party, bro. Do it.
No! I'll light it all on fire. You know how I... I'll burn this fucking motherfucker down.
Do it. Do it, Monk. Do it. You didn't even lock the doors for your fucking homies.
I can't go in and out. I don't think it lets me interact. I basically turn it on and then I can turn it off. So it's a...
That's where we're ending it right there. Richard fucking immediately just fucking flying towards the enemy ship. As the enemy ship thinks it's all A-OK. And they think it was a victory and they got away.
While the crew is regrouping. While Ozone and Nettie are circling back to break open the other door. That's where I'm in it right there.
Well, goddamn, boys.
How many people did you guys kill up there? Because where my thing was, where my thimble was, I couldn't see a good chunk of the map when you guys were cutting people down.
They killed four. All the other three killed themselves. That clear upon- Dude, it's insane.
God damn.
Jake.
Yeah, they're kind of annoying to cut through.
I have your favorite question for you.
One at a time.
How's that experience bar looking?
Fantastic. Welcome to another Level Up. Go ahead, do it.
Do it.
Oh, shit, boys.
Everybody but Pat. Pat gets to be a level behind you.
He came by and said, hey guys.
Oh, son of a bitch.
I was like, he said, hey, guys. Oh, you already messed up the level. I was like, uh-uh. Baby, hold my beer.
Yeah, right. Is that level five Pat? Of course not.
Blah. Well, that was a semi-success.
No, that was I mean, like, that's a complete failure on my part. You guys shouldn't have done a three man like, ooh.
I'm fucking proud. That was great.
That should have been a lot crazier.
You guys kicked ass.
Ozan, did you want that ring in Mithril Chain shirt?
I already have a Methron chain shirt. What was the ring?
The shirt was plus two, though.
Oh, plus two. Sure. Yeah. I mean, actually, I mean,
Fuck yeah.
The ring was a protection plus one. I can't wear armor, though.
Okay, well, then in that case, I don't know, can Pat? My AC is 15. I don't know if 17 is going to make that much of a difference. We could try it.
I don't know.
Hey, well, Ozan, I'm also remixing your whistle after the session. I'll pull it up.
It definitely will.
I'll throw the ring of protection plus one, so I'll give you more AC.
Fuck yeah.
I'll put you up to 18.
Nice, thanks.
Shit, yeah. Sorry about running off with the boots. It was one of those like, no, I'm going to catch them with these boots. If anyone desperately wants them, you can have them.
Hey, man. We're still falling on the same plan as the catch the fucking boat. Catch that boat.
And this is why you always buy an oil flask in addition to a bucket. An oil flask.
Where did it?
Uh-huh.
I ordered my damn door again though. Goddamn doors, damn it. Doors.
Dude, I forgot where changes go in tangible. Like, yeah, no, well, there's doors. Rich was like, fuck doors. No, I go through them. Okay, that's right. How fast do you want to run? He's like 300 feet. I'm like, Jesus Christ.
You have yet to restrain me with a door.
How dare you ruin my easily ruinable plants? Take it off a boss alone waiting for your friends to catch up. Fucking Ozone making everybody laugh and then he's just going and stabbing him in the darkness. This is fucking hilarious.
and also makes it pretty easy, so I can stab on blind people.
And then just fucking nutty, just literally guts falling on the feet.
Are you sure you guys are going to be okay? Yeah, man. I got this. Just fucking cutting weed.
I should have made you roll the trip on intestines. You sweet bitch.
Harden the Dropout. Fucking. Weaky ass fucking.
Good night. Good night, everybody.
Thanks, Jake. Thanks.
Night, guys.
Okay.
Good gaming, brother.
All right, Craig.